By Dorcas Karuana,
Building strong relationships with people is one way that can make you
successful in life, career, family or business. For instance; role
models, mentors, motivators, financiers etc. However there are people
you should either stay away from (if you can achieve it) or people you
have to properly manage if you want to be successful.
1. Haters- We all have enemies; a group
of people who do not wish you well and would rather see you fail than
succeed. The reason(s) they feel this way about you is not really
important because it is practically impossible for you not to have such
people in your life. Hence, there is little or no need for you to try to
please them.
To deal with this persons, I will recommend using one of the 48 laws of power; “Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy.”
Find out whatever they plan against you and be actively a step ahead of
them to ensure that you can counter their every move. However, never
concentrate most of your time, energy and resources into battling them,
consider them as hurdles in your path, scale over them and maintain your
fast sprint to success.
Knowing about your rival is critical. Use spies to gather valuable
information that will keep you a step ahead. Better still: Play the spy
yourself. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect
questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions.
There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying.
2. The Confused- These are people that don’t
really know what they want, how to get what they want and cannot be
relied on for anything if you want to be successful. In most cases the
person does not think as clearly or quickly as you normally do. Confused
people are disoriented and have difficulty paying attention,
remembering, and making decisions. Some confused people may have strange
or unusual behavior or may act aggressively. You must understand them
but never seek their advice or validation for anything. They will only
what? You guessed it- confuse you.
3. The Incompetent- These people are just not capable of doing a job;
they are unreliable and cannot simply deliver. They are biased against
action with plenty of reasons not to take a decision, reasons to wait
for more information, more options, and more opinions. Also, they focus
on small tasks; do not like commitments and lack priorities so whether
it is in terms of seeking advice or getting help in whatever form you
require, do not go for them. You must also be weary of the “arrogantly
incompetent”. They don’t know what they are doing but will claim to know
best. Look away from their superficiality and identify with key
performance indicators, whether or not they are the “masters” they claim
to be.
4. Procrastinators- This group is of people
who never seem to get around to doing things; they just love pushing
forward deadlines. Their favorite quote is “Tomorrow never dies” or
“There is no hurry in Africa”. Procrastinators have confusion of
interests, weak will power are not sure of themselves and always
cautious out of fear; of failure, perhaps fear of success, fear of a
wide variety of challenges of new experiences. These traits are often
tolerated by most of us but can be the most destructive in terms of
preventing us from achieving success. Your motto should be: “Never delay
what you can do immediately.”
5. The Lazy- This set of people just hate
work, cannot properly manage the time and resources. They are best
players in Blame game; never responsible for their actions and always
miss in the action. They accuse their behaviour on addictions to
drinking, smoking, drugs, gambling, sex, chocolate, video games, the
Internet, email etc. You cannot succeed without working whether it is
hard work or smart work, work is still work. Therefore, it is imperative
that you focus on doing the work that is required to be successful and
stay away from lazy people that would like you to be the same with them.
6. Criminals- This ought to be a no-brainer
but with the high number of people who run fowl of the law in their bid
to become successful, it is important to restate what you have heard
several times I am sure, “crime doesn’t pay”. allow me to put it that
'crime doesn’t pay long term.' To be truly successful, you have to
make-it long term. So, no matter how strong the temptation you feel to
go into crime for immediate “success” is, stay away from it to be truly
successful. Criminals are definitely not people you should associate
with; avoid them by all means at your disposal because they will almost
certainly come to you, it isn’t everybody you know that will be upright
in the eyes of the law.
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